Cool SW is due his next visit. Biscuits at the ready.
“Do we need to synchronize answers like Mr & Mrs? You know that programme on the telly?” I ask TT as we are sat waiting for him like a pair of lemons on the sofa.
“Well I don’t think he’s going to send you out to sit in the back kitchen with my headphones on listening to Mos Def whilst I have three choices on guessing your first pet”. He’s not sarcastic all the time my husband, but it was a rabbit by the way and his name was Miffy.
Knock on the door and I run to the door to let Cool SW in. I may as well have laid out a red carpet and a Sudan chair to carry him into the room, I was so flustery. It’s a funny old business. In the next hour or so you are basically going to be asked everything about yourself. Please don’t ask if I will be able to provide my child with good food, I don’t want to have to answer about my speciality of Super Noodles with Nachos. Yes it was another of my nothing in the cupboard weeks. I had just come back from Capetown. Give me some credit for improvising.
“So..” said Cool SW. “What has brought you to adopt?”
We told him about “The Event”. Well, I did. TT didn’t manage to get a word in edgeways, but to be fair I am better talking about that than he is. He still finds it incredibly hard to talk about to this day, where as I find it helped me, he very much keeps it to himself.
He asked us if we were going through IFV or if we had been through it. He explained that if we were then they would not be able to support the process. I has already been given the heads up about this as it would affect the process, but I had been told by my consultant that IFV was a non starter and to be honest it was never something in our plans anyway. I am a great believer in what will be will be. Plus I was past the “free go” and also I know for a fact if we had tried it and it had failed (which it would have, I had been told that I had nothing to work with so to speak), I would have wanted to try again, and then it would be “Well maybe this time..” How many times do you put yourself through that?? Don’t get me wrong I have the utmost admiration for people who have been through rounds and rounds of IFV, but also money was a factor. who really has a spare 4 or 5 thousand pounds? That would already have been snapped up on my collection of Marc Jacobs bags. Kidding TT. I only have 2.
How did you both meet? Well that’s a story and a half. It involves me on a flight back from Milan when I was doing shorthaul. TT coming back from watching Celtic in the Champions League with group of mates and him waiting for me when I got off the flight. The rest is history. I don’t normally pick up my passengers I have to tell you. Well one other time but that was extremely short lived and I’m still not convinced this day that he wasn’t on day release from Broadmoor.
Tell me a little about your families. I am only child. TT says I am spoilt. I like to say cherished. TT is the baby of 5, I like to say attention seeker. But Cool SW says we will discuss that in more detail when we do our separate interviews.
More things included our parents, how many in our family, our friends, how would I cope with flying with a child, do we practise catholicism, what sort of schooling would we be looking at, do we both have the same ideals in bringing up a child? Are we happy to tell the child about their background? Are we happy to have letterbox contact with the birth parents if they are of no threat ie no background of sexual abuse/violence etc, will he/she be happy to eat Super Noodles with Nachos? Ok. The last one is a fib but you can see where I am coming from with what is entailed.
I think we gave him the right answers to the Mr & Mrs Quiz as he pencilled in a visit for me on my own for 2 weeks time. I hope he has pencilled in a good few hours cos I like a good old chat. Plus I am starting to have an obsession with Rich Tea fingers.